How My Mom’s Infertility Brings Me Hope
“The unexplained doesn’t have to be scary; it’s actually exciting.”
Photo by Janelle Pol
My mom has Turner’s Syndrome, which means a whole host of things, including that she’s short, has a very small neck, and, most importantly, is technically infertile.
My mom didn’t actually know she had this syndrome until she started trying to have kids. She soon got “no’s” from doctors all over the country about the possibility of getting pregnant. But she refused to take no for an answer.
For ten years, she worked with renowned infertility doctors in New York who did the scientifically impossible: through the newly developed procedure of In Vitro Fertilization (IVF), my mom got pregnant. I was born in 1995 and my brother was born in 1999. My brother and I are considered, across the scientific community, as miracles. No one could quite explain it. In fact, the Oprah Winfrey Show and Frontline featured my whole family on their shows, trying to wrap their minds around how the impossible happened.
BEING SEEN AS A MIRACLE
The fact that I’m a miracle baby has affected my life in many ways. First, I feel compelled to live my life to honor others because so many people worked for years to make my life a reality. Second, I prioritize family time. My parents dreamed of a family for years and I want to keep their desires intact. Third, I learned there really are events and circumstances in this life we can’t explain. Science doesn’t prove or explain everything, and that’s okay. The unexplained doesn’t have to be scary; it’s actually exciting. And so, I’m patiently waiting for the next cool story of something great happening to someone that they can’t explain.
BEING FILLED WITH HOPE
My parents named me Hope, as they were hoping for ten years to have me. Hope is believing in and being certain of what you can’t see. It’s being convinced that what we hope for will actually happen, which gives us assurance about the things we can’t control or see.
I am filled with expectation about my future and my purpose in life. Even though I have faced challenges, I am convinced those challenges will work out for good and that my story is part of a much larger story. I suffer from anxiety and have sought mental health care for years, but I am less anxious when I dwell on the hope I have through my faith in God. Being able to have a perspective greater than myself gives me peace, joy, and healthy ambition.
I seek to help others experience that hope as well through talking to them about the hopefulness I have, how that certainty comes through faith, and how they can experience that hope, too.
What challenges are you facing? Have you ever been part of something working out that you thought was impossible? How has it changed your perspective on life? What do you hope for in life?
Hope Arcuri lives in downtown Manhattan and works for the global humanitarian aid organization International Rescue Committee (IRC). She manages IRC’s international programs communications. She also writes her own personal blog at www.wordsofhopeblog.com.