On Taking Breaks When There’s No Time To
“These subway-ride moments — moments where we must pause despite having no time to — exist for all of us, no matter where we live or what phase of life we’re in.”
Photo by Janelle Pol
I’m catching glimpses of my bare fingernails as they fly over the keyboard -- right next to my to-do list that has reminded me to “paint nails” for over a month now.
“Write RADIANT article” has been on this list for about the same amount of time. And while it is definitely a higher priority than “paint nails,” I’ve failed to carve out the time to check it off until now.
Week to week, day to day, and moment to moment, I find myself pushing important tasks — things I’m responsible for, even getting paid for — to tomorrow’s to-do list. I feel guilty, but also grateful at the same time for a boss and coworkers, my clients, and the RADIANT community for sympathizing with my new-mom challenges and time constraints. I don’t mean to, but I keep pushing my to-dos to the next day, and the next…
Perhaps it’s true that I’ve never been busier than I am now since becoming a new mother. But looking back, this isn’t the first time that I haven’t had enough time to do everything I need to do, let alone things I want to do like self-care or leisure (i.e., painting my fingernails).
ALWAYS ON THE GO
Before I moved back to Michigan from New York, I worked a day job in the financial district, commuted an hour each way, ran before or after the commute (or actually ran to work on days when I felt like Superwoman), and then tried to write in the evenings when time and energy allowed.
Like most of us, I was constantly on the go and always tired, though I rarely realized just how tired I was. The manic combination of caffeine and anxiety kept me awake even when I finally attempted to sleep, hours after I should have gone to bed.
I wish I could tell you that I have a solution for how to slow down and carve out space for breaks amidst life’s pressing deadlines and demands. What I wish even more is that I could bottle up the excitement and energy you feel in NYC. That energy propelled me into increased productivity five years ago, helping me sprint at hyper speed through tasks with energy to spare.
A NEW YORK SOLUTION
As I mentioned, I’ve moved back to Michigan, but my mind still races like the Second Avenue Q train, even if my progress feels slower than the pace it took to build it. And maybe this is a clue into part of our solution: the subway.
As New Yorkers, no matter where we’re going, we surrender to the subway to get there. And for the duration of our commute, we pause: we sit (or stand) and have an opportunity to take a break from above-ground life.
These subway-ride moments — moments where we must pause despite having no time to — exist for all of us, no matter where we live or what phase of life we’re in.
I might not have a solution for how to take a guilt-free nail-painting break when we’re struggling to complete the more pressing items on our to-do list, but I can offer this: let’s look for the subway-ride moments and embrace those little pauses as prayers -- little moments where we can say “thank you” for the busy lives we’ve been blessed with.
While I can’t call NYC “home” anymore, part of me will always reside there. New York, in all of its beauty, craziness, darkness, and, of course, radiance has inspired the faith within the Michigan-living, writer, runner, coach, trainer, wife, dog owner, and soon-to-be mother that I am today.