3 Soul Care Tips as You Navigate Racial Upheaval

“If we want to see real change, we need to examine the prejudices, discriminatory beliefs, and hatred in our hearts.”

Photo by Janelle Pol

As a black woman, 2020 so far has felt like a real-life gut-wrenching horror film with no reprieve. It has been infuriating, deeply triggering and alarming, but most of all it’s been heartbreaking. Breonna Taylor is me. Ahmaud Arbery, George Floyd and Rayshard Brooks are my father, my uncles, my cousins, my brothers in Christ, my friends. Therefore, looking at what is going on in this country is not just a public issue for me or other black lives; it is deeply personal. It is both sad and scary to think about what could happen to me or anyone I love, who looks like me, at any given moment, as we do everyday things in our day-to-day lives. Drive a car. Jog. Sleep in our beds. Go to church. Ask for help. Enjoy a few drinks. Nap in our cars. Time and time again my community receives the message that our breath, our personalities, our families, our cultures, our stories, our love, our futures, our lives simply do not matter.

In response? I’ve sobbed. I’ve prayed. I’ve read. I’ve buried myself in work. I’ve vented. I’ve dug into resources to further educate myself. I’ve signed petitions. I’ve donated money. I’ve gotten gut honest with God about how angry and hurt I am. I have sat in silence before him when I didn’t have the words to express my feelings. I’ve traveled long distances to be with family and friends. I’ve recognized I’m not doing well. I’ve reluctantly surrendered to receiving help and being cared for. I’ve planned and hosted worship nights to sing and be reminded of how good God still is.

And even with all that, I have by no means arrived at a place of resolution about what’s going on in the world. If I’m being honest, I am very much still struggling. But I’m recognizing that struggling and wrestling through these things with God and my community is okay — as long as I am, and we are, still fighting. 

There are three actions that have been helpful for me in navigating today’s upheaval and uncertainty, and they can be helpful to you, too. 

Leaning into community

In times of turmoil that lead to a lot of heightened emotions, I tend to shut down, pull away and isolate. More and more during this season, I have been able to see how isolation can and will take me out if I’m left to process all that is going on by myself. It’s scary and dangerous, because when you are by yourself, it’s hard to discern what is true or even simply focus on positive things to keep you afloat. I am so thankful for the people in my life who know me, won’t let me hide or run, and continue to check in because they know I won’t ask for help or communicate my needs on my own. As I have been praying and talking with these people in my life, I continue to hear whispers telling me to “lean in.” 

Instead of pulling away because you feel like you just can’t seem to hold it together, let people see you, hear you, know you, care for you, call you higher, and love you. Sometimes it’s not about how you can give, but how you can receive. 

Getting close to Jesus

As I have been grappling with these issues and searching for answers about how to respond, I have been at a loss when relying on my own human wisdom. And so as a follower and believer of Jesus, I looked to the one who tells me he is the way, the truth and the life. I began searching through the gospels for Jesus’ example of how he responded to difficulty, injustices and oppression. I don’t know about you, but growing up, it felt like people made Jesus out to be this docile hippie type of guy who simply let everyone run all over him. But that’s not who Jesus was or is. Nor was he someone who didn’t stand up and address injustice or oppression. First and foremost, both Jesus’ life and death were the targets of injustice. He was a person who did everything right, living a perfect life, yet was falsely accused and killed in a gruesome way he absolutely didn’t deserve. It by no means makes it okay, but as his follower, it gives me solace to know that Jesus has already gone before me in facing such injustice. As I go through it now in this present age, I can be assured that I am not alone in the face of unjust treatment and possibly death, even if I do everything right. I can look to his example for how to respond and speak the truth boldly — with love and grace — but nonetheless, still speak the truth against injustice. When injustice and oppression took place in front of Jesus, he was not silent. He did not shrink back. He spoke up in power and love and called people out. He called them to check and examine what was going on in their hearts and called them to change. By looking to his life I am finding strength and hope in resilience. By looking to his example, I am finding encouragement to speak up. 

Check out Mark 2 and John 8 to see stories about how Jesus handled injustice.

Examining our hearts

Although racism, injustice and oppression have become ubiquitous in society, embedded in policies and governance, these issues begin with the human heart. What does that mean? These internal attitudes and beliefs and external behaviors are manifestations and symptoms of a heart that is impure. In the Bible God tells us, “The heart is hopelessly dark and deceitful, a puzzle that no one can figure out. But I, God, search the heart and examine the mind. I get to the heart of the human. I get to the root of things. I treat them as they really are, not as they pretend to be.”

We can, and should, work to change policies, structures, laws, governance, and narratives that hold injustice and oppression in place. All lives won’t truly matter until black lives do. And we should all do our part in fighting for offenders to be held accountable for their horrific and dehumanizing actions. However, if we want to see real change, we need to examine the prejudices, discriminatory beliefs, and hatred in our hearts. If we don’t, we will continue to put Band-Aids on the problems. New loopholes will always be found, and then what? We will be right back at square one where we find ourselves today in 2020. And that is both exhausting and unacceptable. We must do better. We must be better. But how?

The answer is God. It’s true that only God can bring about real change, but it’s also true that we need to do our part. We need to let God get to the root of the issues in our hearts and let him, as the Great Physician, treat our sicknesses as they really are and not as we pretend them to be. Real change comes when we acknowledge Jesus and allow him to empower us and show us that, through surrender to him, we can have a change of heart, and live a life like his of love, justice and forgiveness. As a black woman I admit that I have work to do. Can you admit the same? Real change begins with me and you.